DRIVERS I CAN'T STAND

1.) The 'I like to jump over at the last minute and, almost or do, cause accidents' driver:

This type of driver presses my 'Cuss Button'. What makes the fucktard think it's OK to jump directly in front of a moving vehicle going 65mph or more??? Dumb as rocks. After an encounter with this type I can be seen fuming from miles away. So much steam comes out of my ears other drivers probably think my car is overheating. If you have a death wish that's fine, but don't involve me or my child. Dummy.

2.)The 'I speed up when I see you trying to get over' driver:

Some people are just 'JACKASSES'. Simple as that. Do they view driving as a video game? And, if you get in front of them they lose points? Do they think they are president of that lane or something? People really irk me.

3.) The 'I'm headed nowhere fast' driver:

This driver is riding behind you, but obviously you are going to slow so they zoom around you. You lose sight of them but a short while later you pull up right beside them at a light. Once the light changes they pull into the McDonald's drive thru. Really? You did all that to be in the same place as me. And on top of that you were in a rush to get a 'heart attack combo'. Dumb.

4.) The 'Make me miss the light' driver:

Ohhhhhh, this driver works my last nerve. They see the hand flashing for the crosswalk so they know the light is going to change soon. So what do they do? They dumb ass slow down. URRRGH. Most of the time they make the light but you're left sitting there. Make me want to catch up with them, get infront of them, and make them miss every light. Sheew. Make me sick.

5.)The 'I do something illegal and almost hit you but I don't give the courtesy wave to show I accept responsibility' driver:

When we are in the car the only way to communicate with other drivers is the horn or signals. So if you make a bullshit move that almost causes some sort-of mishap, it is only polite that you look through your rear view mirror or stick your hand out the window, and give the 'oops my bad' wave. If you don't know or use that rule you shouldn't be driving. Rude ass.

6.)The 'I'm a just squeeze through' driver:

This is the type of driver that may or may not directly effect you. But, to see them in action leaves a bad taste in your mouth and makes you think "What the fuck were you thinking". These are the types of people that some how feel like their car went on a diet and it is now smaller than when they bought it. I look at them like "You know damn well you cant squeeze into that spot" or "You know damn well your car cant fit between that other car and the curb"...But somehow they feel like they have the incredible shrinking car and they can make impossible moves. And although the end results can be hilarious, the fact that they we're that stupid is quite irritating.

AGONY

What do you do when you're screaming in someones ear, but they still don't hear you? You stand in front of them and wave a white flag, yet they continue to hold you captive. Your cries and pleas fall on death ears. Your apologizes are treated like fuck-yous. What do you do when what used to be so sweet, is now rancid? Deep conversations turn into trivial chat. How do you accept the fact that you are the cause? You took their kindness for weakness, and love for granted. You were once the cold-hearted warden of the prison in which you kept their heart. Doing as you pleased, with no regard to their needs. No longer able to stand the abuse, although apprehensive and unsure, they escape. Free from you. Free from the torture of nothing ever being right. What do you do when it seems like their better off with out you? Without them you struggle. You search, but cant find anything that can even come close. Lonesome. How do you cope with the realization that you are not in control. Disarmed and vulnerable. How do you deal with the possibility that things wont get better over time. You begin to forget, then your reminded. A word. A look. A place. Dry streaks become brand new streams of tears. Heartache. You take it as a learning experience, but don't want your new found skills used on anyone else. Stuck. You try to be silent and wait. Patience is a virtue, right? But just one day seems like week's. You continue to ask yourself why you were such a fool. You've heard 'you don't know what you got, till its gone' a thousand times. Why didn't you actively listen? Now all you hear is silence.

LOVE...

I broke up with my boyfriend 6 months ago and I'm just now sorta-kinda getting over it. I swear our break-up has been so mentally draining. I will be single for awhile. Which is sad to me because I love, love. There is nothing like having someone that you can feel, but not touch. There is nothing like having someone that nobody else has, the way you have. There is nothing like looking into someones eyes and wanting to stay there forever, frozen in time. So opposite, yet so much the same. But, sadly and gladly all things change. The only love that surpasses is a Mother's love. What a love. Just thinking about it brings tears to my eyes. I am from which he came. 9 months he grew inside of me. A bond that cant be broken. So pure. So undeniable. A part of my heart will forever be on the outside. Amazing. My son. He knows I will protect him, yet he feels the need to protect me. It hurts me that he feels my pain. But he can't help it. When he feels it he tries his best to make it go away. A kiss. A hug. A joke, "Mama you farted" as he burst into laughter. A piece of tissue to wipe the tears away. The man that will forever be in my life. No words can express. I would give my life for his. He is my inspiration; he has no idea. The breaths he takes as he sleeps keeps me going. My Angel.

It's funny how loss can make you realize what you have. What you need. What's important. There is no joy without pain. I can't wait to see what the day brings. Eventually things will be just right. Go wrong. Then go right again. Life's flow; life's poetry. So Beautiful. So Tragic. We struggle and fight to live because of the glimpse of light we see through the storm. Deep down we know that this life may not be the best, but it is what we were giving. A gift.

It's funny how your heart can sporadically pour out it's emotions. Peace. Be blessed.

5 THINGS TO HELP THE MIND, BODY AND SOUL

1.) Daily prayer/meditation....Your mind is like the house to your soul. Like your physical house, if the mind is cluttered it is hard to concentrate, find things and/or have peace. Prayer helps to unclutter the mind. It focuses you on the things which are important. It is your one time to be alone (on earth) with just you and God. You can really figure out what you've being doing right, and what you've being doing wrong. Not only is prayer good for you and those around you; its absolutely free.

2.)Healthy Snacking...It is very important to snack throughout the day. And most people do so. Only problem is that they do so with 'junk food'. The importance of snacking is to keep you 'fueled' through out the day and lessen your appetite around lunch and dinner time. So if your filling yourself up with junk all day that's exactly what your going to feel like. Not only that, but those fats will begin to add up to numbers, and all those numbers will have a meeting on the weight scale. Leaving you feeling disappointed, ashamed, and unhealthy.

Healthy snacks:

• Raw almonds,





• bananas,



• whole-grain cracker w/ cottage cheese,





• vegan chocolate chip cookies (if you must satisfy that sweet tooth, they are just as good as "regular" cookies)

3.)Participate in Cultivating Entertainment...Going to he movies for a night out is fine, but it lacks substance. The only thing you really take away from it nowadays is how bad the movie was. There are so many alternative options, that are cheaper and more life inspiring. All you have to do is turn to the "Life & Style' portion of your daily newspaper and there are listing of events going on all around town. Recently I found out that the newly built 'California Academy of Science' has NiteLife. They serve cocktails, food, and play music. There are all sorts of things such as:

• Art Exhibits




• Museums






• Plays







• Cultural Dance Recitals




• Spoken word




• Comedy Show (comedians can be very cultivating lol)

4.)Spend Time With Family...There is no family, like yo family. I know that everybody doesn't have a huge family or a 'good' family. But even if it's one person or a friend you consider family, enjoy that persons company. Family can be very supportive, if you let them. Schedule a family event at a park one weekend or invite everybody out to eat or over for dinner (on a non-holiday day lol). Because whether you know it or not being close with your family gives you a since of belonging and a assuring similarity that you should treasure.

5.)Forgive...Holding hate, resentment or malice towards someone is poisonous and futile. You do more harm to yourself than the person you cant forgive. See, resentment festers silently, which grows into hate and malice. Causing your very being to be stunted. Because things cannot grow and flourish on tumorous barren land. Unneeded and unnecessary stress can lead to depression, unhealthy skin (which includes nails and hair), and most lethal, cancer. Just let it go. Take whatever bad experience you had with dealing with a person and use it as a tool to make yourself and others around you better. You will feel like a weight has been lifted.

IM SO CLOSE TO NEVER EATING AGAIN...BLEH

Ok, so I'm already a finicky eater. I don't eat beef, pork or most types of fish. I don't eat Chinese food and I stopped eating Mickey D's almost 10 yrs ago (I will admit to having some sweet tea and some fries, far and in between). Actually for the most part I rarely eat out; I love to cook. Plus all it takes is one too many times for me to hear something bad about a place or product and I'm done. No get back.

Well I happened to be just moseying through the Internet and came across one of the most disgusting things i have ever seen or heard in my life. Story goes, after attempting to guzzle down a cold can of Diet Pepsi a Florida man proceeds to gag. After further investigation conducted by him and his wife, she explains that "He emptied out the can down a sink but something heavy remained inside... shook the can over a paper plate until something resembling 'pink linguini' slid out, followed by 'dark stuff'"

Let me just start by saying, I would have turned into a mute (Maya Angelou style from 'I know why the cage bird sings'). I mean nothing left to say. A part of my soul would have went down the drain with the remains of that beverage. It wouldn't have mattered what the unknown substance was. I would have been a scarred and broken woman. But to make matters worse (as if they could get any worse), the FDA just confirmed that it was frog "residue" that was encapsulated in the cold can of Diet Pepsi. Unfuckinbelievable.

To top this bullshit off, Pepsi is throwing the couple shade, as if they aren't responsible. Shiiiit, I would have videos, pictures, sworn testaments, doctor's bills and everything ready and needed to sue the 'Pep' out the 'Si'. Hell, just in case they tried to draw the case out, in hopes that the evidence withered away, I would have had them frog remains cyrogenically frozen. I would have to carry my mute soul, equip with a sign language interpreter, onto Oprah, Ellen, Tyra, The View; hell, I would have gotten Sally Jessie Rapheal out of retirement (red glasses and all). I would not just go quietly into the night, even as a mute.

I figure that the only way you wont hear more about this story going to court is if the couple is trying run a scam. And people ain't shit, so it's definitely a possibility. I actually hope that they are. Because if they're not, you might as well stick a fork in my can drinking days; done.

Dealing With 'Crazy'

I witnessed a crazy person going of on a tangent yesterday, which made me think about an incident that happened to me a while ago. See, I was walking back home from a girlfriends house, which was a total of maybe 3 blocks away. Before I could get to the corner a crazy bum started walking towards me growling like a damn bear. In my mind I was thinking "Fuck. Imma have to fight this bum. But, how is that going to work when I don't even want him to touch me." And, I could only imagine me tripping and him falling on me; dead. I would just shrivel up like a salt ridden slug and die. So, I thought a second longer and came to the conclusion that I had to fight crazy with crazy. It was at that point that i turt around and said "DONT EVEN TRY IT. STOP PLAYIN" with a dead-serious face...Oooops to him, if he thought he was bout to punk me. I bet you he stopped dead in his tracks and left me the hell alone.

See, the crazy person just described was what I like to call 'conveniently crazy' (like the gentleman pictured to the left). They act a fool when they can get away with it but let somebody stand up for themselves or bust them up-side they head, then their 'craziness' will fall to the waste side. Then and only then will they miraculously remember the bill of rights, the number to 911, and that 'they thought you was somebody else'. On the other hand the 'real crazy' person is little bit more difficult and down right scary to deal with. Especially when they are in your family.

I know most of the people reading this either have a 'real crazy' (like ol' boy pictured below)person in their family or know about a real crazy person in someone else's family. The crazy cousin or uncle that grandma keeps in a room in the back of the house. And you try to act comfortable when you go over because everybody else is cool with 'Cousin Pete' but in reality you're really scared shitless. And unbeknown to everybody else you have already mapped out escape routes and weapons that can be used for self-defense in every room of the house. And it seems like he is always looking at you with those cold soul-less eye's. Like when your eating Thanksgiving dinner at the table and he's not eating, just looking at you eat. And your thinking "This is some bullshit. I know they see him staring at me like he want to rape and kill me. But ain't nobody gonna say shit. And they wonder why I don't never come to family events at grandma house. Somebody know they can face him towards the TV or take him back to his room if he ain't eating. Trifling bastards." And if that's not bad enough. You damn near get a bladder infection from holding your pee in, because grandma gotta a old house and the only bathroom is way in the back next to 'Cousin Pete' bedroom. Finally you can't take it anymore. You're one fall, one laugh, one sneeze away from peeing on you're self, so you mustard up the courage to go to the bathroom. You creep down the hallway and make it in. You try to creep out but BAM there he is looking at you wide-eyed and ready to pounce. You scream, then everybody rushes to see what's wrong. So, you have to make up a lie and say you thought you saw a mouse.

Yea, dealing with crazy folks takes a lot of analyzing. Once you decipher the level of craziness then and only then can you act accordingly.